Sitting outside in the courtyard of Masjid Al-Haram in Makkah, I looked on at the multitude of people coming out of the Masjid, peaceful and satisfied, after a serene meeting with their Creator in the Isha prayer. While I was slowly engaging in Dhikr, a sudden disturbance called for attention. I looked up again to see three funeral processions rushing toward the road. I scanned the covered, lifeless bodies being carried on the stretchers. My heart, filled with dread and fear, thought: ‘How long before I'll be carried like that?' My mind then traveled back in the memory lane to another scene and another place. We were all gathered in her room. We all saw her fingers and toes slowly turning a slight hue of blue. My gaze was moving toward her face and I noticed her eyes staring into mine for a second and then towards others present in the room. I tried talking to her but all she did was stare. Suddenly, at the continual insistence of my mother, she uttered the Shahadah, the testimony of faith. Then her eyes turned blank without expression and stared straight. The cries around me made me realize that she was no more and that she had passed away peacefully to the next world. She was my dear Nani (grandmother), may Allah forgive her and grant her Al-Firdaws. The scene of her peaceful death that I witnessed five years ago is still fresh in my mind. My skin shivers and my eyes well up every time I remember that day, every time I remember those staring eyes watching and feeling things that we could not. I remember how I had helped in washing her lifeless body and how we wrapped her in three pieces of plain white cloth. ‘How long before I would be the one lying here being washed by others?' were the thoughts running in my mind. My grandmother was blessed, Masha Allah. She lived 84 years and saw her great grandchildren too. But will everyone be so fortunate? Do we feel certain that we would live to an old age? Do we feel secure and safe from death which can pounce on us at any given moment? Have we prepared for this “destroyer of worldly pleasures”? What if today were our last day? Do we want to meet our Lord in our present state, loaded with sins? Remember when we were in school and the teacher used to come take our exam papers and we would plead for an extra minute to write those few more sentences? What about our life and deeds? The Angel of Death will give us no extra time. Allah says: “Every soul will taste death, and you will only be given your (full) compensation on the Day of Resurrection. So he who is drawn away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has attained (his desire). And what is the life of this world except the enjoyment of delusion.” (Qur'an, 3:185) Every time I remember my grandmother's death, I wonder about the infinite blessings of Allah that take for granted. Our precious lives that we waste in trivial worldly pursuits without worrying about what lies in front of us – our final meeting with Allah. Our dear Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Make the most of five things before five others: life before death, health before sickness, free time before becoming busy, youth before old age, and wealth before poverty.” (Musnad Ahmad) Have we ever thought about these and the uncountable blessings of Allah? He gives and gives, but all that ascends up to Him from us is ungratefulness and disobedience. Allah is not in need of us, the small insignificant sinning beings that we are. If we are thankful and obedient to Him, it is again good for our own selves. It is only we who benefit. Allah says: “Whatever you have will end, but what Allah has is lasting. And We will surely give those who were patient their reward according to the best of what they used to do.” (Qur'an, 16:96) “Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward (in the Hereafter) according to the best of what they used to do.” (Qur'an. 16:97) Subhan Allah! What more do we need? Allah tells us clearly the result of obeying Him. So do we still hesitate? Allah, the Most Merciful, keeps on giving us chances to mend ourselves, repent and turn back to Him with good deeds. But are we utilizing these opportunities? We instead play games. We accept and follow some of His commands and leave others by giving petty excuses because of being occupied with sins. We know about the obligation of prayer on time, but we ignore. The men know about the importance and reward in congregation, but are too lazy to walk to the nearest Masjid. We are commanded to be dutiful to our parents, but we mistreat them. We know Riba (interest), bribery, and plucking of eyebrows are Haraam, but we pretend as if it doesn't matter. We know Hijab is obligatory, but all we say is ‘Insha Allah soon'! But what if that ‘soon' never comes. Ibn Umar said: Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) took me by my shoulder and said: “Be in this life as if you were a stranger or a traveler on a path and if you reach the evening then do not expect to reach the morning, and if you reach the morning then do not expect to reach the evening. Take from your health before your sickness, and from your life before your death.” (Al-Bukhari) What if the angel of death arrives when we are busy disobeying Allah? A wise person once said, “The people are sleeping and they wake up only when they die.” Alhamdulillah we find ourselves in the midst of the blessed month of Ramadan – a month of change, a month when good deeds are made easy and du'as are accepted. It's a gift from the Lord of the Worlds for sinning beings like us to recharge our sleeping souls and reform ourselves to become humble slaves of Allah. It's a special month. We stay away from even the Halaal things during this month, so we should be able to avoid the Haraam after this month of training is over. So let us make use of this blessed time to hold ourselves accountable before we are held accountable before Allah. And then we won't have the chance to go back and change things. So let us now change our lives, our goals and our pursuits completely. This is our chance. This might be our last Ramadan. Next year we may be in our grave – either in a happy or a distressed state. Let us Insha Allah submit to Allah wholeheartedly. Get closer to Him. Seek Islamic knowledge and act upon it to please Him. Let us just live for Allah and notice how our life will be filled with peace and success Insha Allah.
