Saudi Gazette Who is responsible for running a better household, husband or wife? This new debate has created friction between couples. Husbands feel that since they earn, they have the right to run the house, on the other hand, wives believe that they can efficiently put the money to good use because they know the needs of the house better than their partner. For men, cultural traditions act as an obstacle in the face of handing over the money to their wife. They feel that by giving money they will lose their authority to rule over the house. Khalid Al-Thaqafi believes that the man of the house should be responsible for managing the family's budget. “Men are better able to plan for the future, save money for a rainy day, and make wiser financial decisions. In general, women tend to spend more profusely than men and are easily swayed by the latest fashions, advertisements for desirable products, and discounts that motivate women to buy more,” he told Al-Watan. Khadija Nasser, a wife and a mother, strongly disagrees, she said, “Gone are the days when women had no say in the family's budget. Today, many women are single parents, they are the sole breadwinners for their families, and are doing well financially. Women are educated these days; they work and they know their responsibilities. They are capable enough to manage the family's money. Balance between the two spouses is ideal and both partners should consult with one another before making big purchases and respect one another's opinions. Even the children in the family can be involved in the decision making process of how the monthly income should be managed.” Another Saudi woman, Fatimah Al-Shareef, said, “In most cases, giving the wife the command over the family's budget will have positive results and will actually help the family save money. After the couple sets their goals and priorities for the family's spending, the wife should manage the money at home. A woman who holds herself accountable for the money in the family and how it is distributed will actually spend less than the woman who has to ask for money for each necessity. “A woman who is responsible for the family's budget will spend less on impulse at every whim, demand less, and will think twice before making purchases. In addition, a sense of unison and partnership will develop between husband and wife.” One serious problem that many Saudi women face is the incessant fear that if the man saved up a massive wad of money, he would remarry. “Some women in this society will exert all measures in their power to slash the husband's savings and many of them strive to leave the poor man penniless so that he will never have enough money to spend on a second wife. These anxieties are so firmly rooted in the thinking of the women in my community that I cannot trust a woman to reasonably manage the family budget and maintain a financial cushion that the family can lean on in the future,” said Saleh Al-Ghamdi. For Ayid Al-Harthi, it is not lack of trust or confidence in his wife that prevents him from laying the family budget in his wife's hands; it is his knowledge of her soft heart when it comes to the children's demands. “My wife usually thinks with her kind heart rather than her rational mind. She often gives in to the children's constant pleas for extra luxuries, toys, and gadgets. I can handle the family's budget better because I can differentiate between the family's necessities and excess luxuries, and thus save for our unknown future,”he said. Family psychologist and sociologist in King Abdulaziz University, Dr. Adnan Al-Baar, told Al-Watan, “Managing money is not related to gender but it is related to mentality and individual personality, and it differs from one person to another; man or woman. There are plenty of men who spend wisely and know their priorities and there are men who are spendthrifts and seem to have a hole in their pockets. Just the same, there are women who can be very economical and there are those who spend more than they save. “So the family should examine the personalities and tendencies of the husband and wife and jointly decide who is best fit at managing the budget. The successful family is the one that acknowledges the strengths and weaknesses in each family member and use the strengths to the advantage of the family as a whole.” __
